Author: Karen Foster

I'd like to say I've changed, but after decades of living, I still have the same four passions. My relationship with Jesus, spending time with family, attending live theater, and writing devotions & first-person stories about a loving, faithful God who reveals Himself in our every day circumstances.

What Are You Holding Onto, and Why?

Culinary Connoisseurs, here’s something for your Pinterest Board.

Brussel Sprouts a la Frozen. Simply scrub off the ice. Simmer them in boiling water. Lather with a stick of butter.

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Doesn’t the thought make your mouth water? Me too! Unfortunately, before I could cook them, my husband—who hates Brussel Sprouts—happened to see the expiration date on the package: Oct 14, 2009.

“No way!” I grabbed my magnifying lens and examined the package. “It expires Oct 2014, on the ninth day.”

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Considering it was June 2015, and I was NOT in the mood to have my stomach pumped, I reluctantly tossed the Brussel Sprouts into the garbage. Soon I was on a mission to excavate the other expired food from the depths of my freezer.

Sadly, my freezer had become a frozen coffin for food.Still hopeful, I waved a squished object at my husband. “Is this is any good?”

“What is it?”

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“An ice cream sandwich.”

He rolled his eyes, and opted for a PBJ sandwich. “Blog about your expired food.”

I handed him two slices of bread after I double-checked them for green mold. “But what’s the message?”

“Learning to let go.”

His tone of voice implied that I might be in danger of reaching my expiration date. However, if “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”, my husband would have let me go after the first week of marriage.

Who knew he didn’t like cold hot dogs for dinner?

Only to say, Husband’s comment about letting go reminded me of a recent conversation with a friend. We’d been talking about our grown children moving on, and how this season of motherhood had changed in a bittersweet way!

We agreed. “It’s hard to let go.”

However, learning to let go encompasses more than watching someone we care about move away, or die. It’s more than leaving a familiar job, or downsizing to a retirement community.

Sometimes we refuse to let go of the very things that are holding us down.

  • Abusive marriages
  • Bad influences
  • Unhealthy personal habits
  • Grudges and unforgiveness
  • Material possessions
  • Living in the past
  • Emotional baggage like old audio tapes in our head that accuse us of being:

“Ugly. Stupid. Unworthy. Friendless. (Fill in the blank).”

Letting go of expired, frozen Brussel Sprouts might be funny (unless you’re starving), but I’m curious. And convicted!

What am I holding onto, and why? 

Perhaps it’s time to seek the Lord, and ask Him!

“There’s a right time to hold on and another to let go.” (Ecclesiastes 3:6 Message)

Who Can Fill the Hole?

Hot tears rolled down my cheeks during intermission.

“Do you want to leave the play?” my nineteen-year-old son asked.

“No, I’m going to see how this ends. Surely, there’s some value.”

People may not agree with me, but there was nothing redeemable about the musical, “The Book of Mormon.” I found it crude and offensive on multiple levels.

I’m not Mormon, and I rarely attend a play that I haven’t reviewed before hand. However, my son persuaded me while we were in London.

“It won a Tony Award. It’s been running for a long time.” My son later apologized for also going into this performance blind!

Really? This represents America’s best?

However, nothing is wasted.

I tend to live in a Christian cocoon.  Rubbing elbows with our post-modern culture is always an eye-opener.

What I found offensive—swearing and overt sexual language—entertained the audience. They lapped up the Jr. High bathroom humor like it was creme.

That didn’t grieve me as much as the actors who mocked God. Religion as a whole seemed like a joke.

If this grieves my heart, how does the Lord feel?

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Earlier that day, my son and I had gone to Westminster Abbey. Tourists, from around the world, paid to see the historical and majestic building where coronations are held, and royal weddings take place.

The tombs of kings and queens, and memorial plaques honoring famous people, were interesting. But the church seemed more like a museum than a place to worship. If ever there was a place to hear the Gospel message, why not here?

Watching The Book of Mormon that evening, only solidified my heavy heart for the misguided souls around me.

How can they believe in Christ if they do not hear? How can they hear, if we don’t tell them?

Soon thereafter, I heard the Rock song, Flaw, which includes these lyrics, “I have a hole in my soul. I can’t fill it. I can’t fill it. I have a hole in my soul. Can you fill it? Can you fill it?”

I don’t know the songwriter’s intent, but those words struck a chord in me.

We’re all born with a hole in our soul. And we can’t fill it with ourselves!

Neither can anything or anyone else on earth. Although looking at the carrots we chase, you’d think otherwise.

Only the Lord, God can fill the hole in our souls, and satisfy us. His Son, Jesus, has the holes in His hands to prove how much God loves us.

But God won’t force Himself on anyone.

He does, however, warn us, “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it” (Isaiah 30:15)

Are you Afraid?

You’ve felt it, right?

Skin tingling, warm neck, heart palpitations….

Compliments of FEAR that rises in your belly even though your mind tries to be rational.

My daughter used to scream whenever she saw a spider on the wall. Using a tissue, I’d grab the innocent, unsuspecting creature, and flush him down the toilet.

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“How can you do that?” she’d ask.

Because I’m not afraid of spiders.

I am, however, afraid of falling from great heights.

A few weeks ago, my husband offered to buy me lunch at Half Moon Bay near San Francisco. Instead of driving four hours, he wanted to fly me there in a two passenger (tandem seating) Citabria. Otherwise known as a taildragger plane.

“It’s only a two-hour flight,” he said. “It’ll be fun!”

Flying, fun? I had a panic attack before I got into the plane.

It’s not that I don’t trust my husband as a pilot. He has thousands of flying hours. But there’s something about sitting in a small area (behind the pilot) with a few inches of light-weight materials (metal, wood, fabric) between me and 3,000 feet of space that makes me….AFRAID!

However, I wanted to be courageous.

While Husband flew the plane, I made myself smile and repeat the Bible verse: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” I can do this…even this.

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I also listened to a podcast on anxiety.

The narrator’s soothing voice instructed me to, “Place both your feet on the ground.”

That’s the problem. My feet aren’t on the ground.

“Breathe deep.”

Smells like jet fuel.

“Close your eyes. What do you hear?”

The loud rumble of a single engine with a propellor which I pray doesn’t quit in midair.

Such were my anxious thoughts while my sweaty hands clung to each side of the plane. Not unlike the way I cling to the metal cage of a ferris wheel. As if that would cushion my fall!

When the plane finally landed near the Pacific Ocean, my husband mentioned the breathtaking scenery we’d flown over. I couldn’t comment. I missed most of it because my eyes were squeezed shut.

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As for lunch, I didn’t have an appetite. I stared at the menu, wondering, How much is a bus ticket home?

Do I hear laughter? He who is without fear cast the first stone.

Fear is first mentioned in Genesis when Adam told God, “I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.” (3:10)

God knows our propensity to be afraid.

Afraid of objects. Afraid of the unknown. Afraid of change.

Afraid of death, man, failure, rejection.

And yet, whenever fear is mentioned in the Bible, scripture reminds us that in every situation—even death—God is always present and all-powerful.

“Therefore, we will not fear though…..”

I know this to be true. And “the truth,” Jesus said, “will set you free.” This includes freedom from worry and fear.

That means I must habitually renew my mind by immersing myself in God’s Word in order to know the truth.

And then cling to Truth regardless of sweaty hands.

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Otherwise, I’ll fly through life with my eyes closed. Unable to enjoy the journey.

What makes you afraid?

Tired of Striving?

Learn to Be Still
“Stop doing things for God, and spend more time Being in His presence.” Loretta Chalfant

Are you performance-driven?

That’s how I lived. Always striving to be productive. The more things I scratched off my list at the end of the day, the BETTER, I felt.

Who am I kidding? I’m still that way. The problem is, there’s always another list.

A friend of mine told me, “Christian women are horrible when it comes to knowing how to Rest.”

Could it be Christian women spend too much time striving to be a “good Christian” rather than rest in who we are in Christ?

Because I’m wired to be performance-driven, I originally took that mindset into my Christian walk. I felt the more I did for God, the more He’d love me. Isn’t that how it works in life with people?

My love language is acts of service so loving God meant I had to serve Him on top of trying to be the perfect wife and supermom. You’ve heard of the Proverbs 31 woman, right?

So over the years, this “good Christian” worked in the church nursery. Taught children’s Sunday School.  Made meals for sick people. Attended Women’s Bible Study. Showed up whenever there was a women’s event. For a time, home schooled my kids. Volunteered in their school classrooms. Drove on every field trip.

Oh, don’t forget reaching out to the neighbors. We have to evangelize. And Christians must be Light and Salt in the community: Help the homeless, the poor, the people in jail.

Yada yada….DID I FORGET SOMETHING?

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Bottom line: I was like a worn out, limp dishrag, trying so hard to earn God’s love and approval. Never certain I hit the mark. Never satisfied with my performance. 

Please, say I’m not the only one.

That’s when the Lord brought a spiritual mentor into my life. Loretta listened to me during Bible Study, and recognized the taskmaster within me.

“Stop Doing things for God,” she said, “and spend more time Being in His Presence.”

Sheer exhaustion made me stop. That, and the desire to experience more of God.

I made an honest appraisal of everything I thought I had to earn, or experience, to be satisfied. I asked myself:

  • Why am I doing these things?
  • If I do more for God, will He love me more?

Old habits are hard to break, but I learned from experience that intimacy with God doesn’t happen because I have lots of Biblical knowledge or serve others.

Intimacy comes from knowing God. And that happens when we make the time to be still in God’s presence…meditating on His Word, listening for His voice. Seeking His face, not His blessings.

Only then, can our hearts rest and be satisfied even in this….hectic world.

Bench photo: Courtesy of Jennifer Foster

Have You Felt Invisible?

Have you ever felt invisible?

ID-100111764 Even though you were in a room with people who knew you?

I remember a little girl in kindergarten. One day, during recess, she went to the edge of the playground and sat with her back to her peers.

She said, “I just wanted to know if anyone would notice.”

Imagine being that five-year-old girl. Surrounded by classmates who jumped rope, climbed monkey bars, and laughed—oblivious to her.

Or if they noticed the solitary figure, they weren’t concerned enough to ask her, “Why are you sitting alone?”

They didn’t call her name or beg, “Come and play.”

Who knows what motivated that little girl to sit alone with her back to the crowd. Did the need for affirmation, backfire? Did she build walls of self-protection?

What painful thoughts stabbed her as she waited, and waited, wanting…

To be Noticed. To be Missed.

How does it feel to be invisible?

To hear people talk around you, but act like you’re not there. To have someone ask you a question without waiting for the answer. Or never listen to your words.

Once, there was a man who suffered from seisures, possessed by demons. He lived alone in the tombs, outside a town. People thought him mad, and tried to chain him. But he escaped, and ran wild.

So they avoided him. Pretended he wasn’t there.

Did he feel invisible?

Then one day a Stranger came along and saw the man. The Stranger took pity, and healed him with His words.The people were amazed when they saw the man, in his right mind, sitting at the Stranger’s feet.

How did this happen? Who is this Stranger?

Fearful, the people told the Stranger, “Go away. Leave us alone!”

But imagine the joy of that man who had lived alone among the dead, and was now set free?

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A life forever changed because Someone noticed. Someone cared.

One act of kindness–even from a stranger–can make a difference. Because maybe deep down, inside of us, we’re like that five-year-old girl.

We want Someone to notice.

Can you remember a time someone made a difference in  your life?

Do you know WHO the Stranger was who healed the man?

(Woman Image: Courtesy of Frame Angel at FreeDigitalPhotos.net)